Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Roissy's Advice For Men Is Mostly Toxic

Over at a blogger named Roissy has earned himself quite the following among wannabe PUAs. His strategies on how to game women in order to get laid are cut from the same cloth as most everything you can find in the PUA community. He pulls no punches, and in his view, men are perfectly justified in pulling out all the stops in order to acquire sex from hot women. Manipulation ala Mystery Method seems to be his central strategy. According to him, things like negs, manipulation, and passing shit tests are all fair game. Although I can understand the desire to want to get this part of your life "handled", Roissy and PUAs in general do a great disservice to men by teaching them to go through all this stuff. There are several reasons why. The first reason is that "game" is essentially a coping strategy for a woman's shitty behaviour. In fact, the more shallow and immature a woman is, the more game seems to make sense. But even working at maximum effectiveness, game usually just garners female attention by making women feel less than desirable. It's a way of getting women to prostitute themselves (in a manner of speaking) in order to feel better about themselves (in your eyes). However, it does not mean you will get laid (it usually doesn't). And if it does happen to get you laid the sex is usually subpar, for the simple reason that the target women are after the self-esteem boost, not the sex. But in a gamer's world, any result is a good result.

The second reason is that game only focuses on what guys should be doing or should not be doing, which of course gives very little incentive for women to change their ways. Because, even if a bitch of a woman knows there are guys out there running game, all she has to do is keep doing what she's doing, with the understanding that it's up to the guy to somehow find a way to break through her bullshit defenses. So essentially, a gamer (PUA) is a female apologist. In his mind, it's always up to the guy to get the girl, not for the girl to make it easier for the guy. So game actually encourages women to become even more selfish and less proactive in their interactions with men, for the simple reason that there are guys out there that have raised the bar on what men should put up with from women, namely PUAs. This has a ratcheting effect. Girl plays hard to get. Guy learns game to get the girl. Girl resists guy's game. Guy goes back to the drawing board. And on and on.

The third reason is an extension of the above reason. Basically, game puts men at the mercy of women's actions. By learning and synthesizing behaviour to attract women, guys are becoming more like bitches and less like men. This can take a toll on a guy's self-worth and throws off that sense of give-and-take, in which you are only ever able to meet someone halfway. Otherwise nothing happens. This is common wisdom in the business world (i.e. equal partnership) but not in the general dating world (guys have to do most of the work), and certainly not in the PUA world (guys have to do all the work).

Roissy and his ilk are helping create an army of guys that are extremely apologetic for women's shitty behaviour because of their deluded view that by simply running proper game you can get most every woman. Game is basically self-reinforcing, and all a woman has to do is sit back and watch the fun, knowing that it is totally in her power to reject a guy for not having enough game. Back to the drawing board you go, male-bitch! Let's see what ya got next time!

Related post: The PUA Scam


Anonymous said...

Recently I unsubscribed to most of the PUA-related email lists out there because frankly I'm tired of it. It's just a rehash of the same shit over and over again. I'm just not interested in running PUA material anymore. It's unnatural and the possible end result (free sex) isn't worth the ego boost (which wears off over time) in the long run.

Don't get me wrong, the PUA movement got me where I am today, and I've learned SO much from it, but there comes a point where you have to move past it. There comes a point where you realize that you're exerting too much effort for minimal return, often with women who don't have their shit together themselves.

Today I'm more focused on becoming successful and having a great lifestyle than trying to pickup women. I really don't care to "open sets" anymore unless it's obvious that the women are attracted to me. I don't care to do much cold approaching these days, either. Let's face it, we as average American men are trying to sell something in a buyer's market. If that market isn't working, then you have to move it elsewhere.

I was in Toronto last weekend and all of the stories that I read over the years regarding Toronto women was confirmed. Women rarely give you eye contact, and curt responses to your questions seem to be the norm. The women walk around in a semi-catatonic state, trying very hard to not make eye contact with anyone. A few times I even said hello to them, and it was like I wasn't even there. It can be frustrating to try to connect in an environment like this. Women do not value men in Westernized cultures, in my opinion. Personally, I think the infiltration of American culture has a lot to do with it.


John said...

For me, PUA material was a template for different things to try, a way to exercise my social muscles. But it could never become a part of my personality, even in those few cases where it worked. I think ultimately it turns men into highly developed women pleasers, even if the guy on the surface comes across as very "alpha".

It was precisely my experience with Toronto women that made me realize how useless PUA really is when women just don't want to get with you from the very beginning of the interaction. It became a highly ridiculous exercise to keep going back to the drawing board every time things didn't work out with some uptight bitch. Good thing that intelligence and common sense eventually took over.

So, Toronto women are now one less thing for you to wonder about, now that you've seen what they are like first hand :) Which places in the city did you try talking to them? How were the other Ontario cities that you visited?