Saturday, September 19, 2009

Start Saying No

There's a saying that women are the choosers. That may be true if men are always willing to say yes, but as soon as we start (selectively) saying no, then it's no longer true.

As men, it's important to get out of the "pursuing" mindset where women are concerned. It can only help us.

Keep in mind that many women reject many decent men for petty reasons, so it's only fair that men start rejecting women for good reasons. And there are many. I put together some of the reasons for rejecting a woman.

• After you state your intentions, she doesn't go along willingly. She seems "unsure" of the situation and seems to want reassurance of some kind. It's best to let her go. Women who want the same thing as you don't ask a lot of questions. They want to take the quickest and shortest path to get there. If she doesn't do this, move on.

• She rejected you years ago when she was slim and attractive. But now, years later, after putting on weight (less attractive), she wants you. Next.

• She is not enthusiastic when she is with you. But being a gentleman you may naturally want to fix the situation and "win her over". Resist this urge. Next.

• She doesn't ask you questions about you, despite you taking an interest in her life. Finish the conversation, and move on.

• She asks you "what do you do?" early in the conversation. She's a ho. Move on.

• She likes you but is too shy to act on it. If she is very young it's probably okay to keep her as a friend, since she might mature later on. But for an older girl (e.g. over 25) let her go. Her views are probably firmly cemented and she's not worth the effort.

• She gives the impression that it's up to you to make it okay for her to do something. In other words, she won't take responsibility for her actions. For example, she implies that she wants you to be a jerk towards her so that she won't "fall for you", but at the same time she wants the sex to be good. What is she, a child? Next.

• At the club, on the dance floor, she dances near you but refuses to look at you. In some cases, the girl will back up into you and grind up against you, but will refuse to turn around and look at you. She is not taking responsibility for her actions. Next. However, in the case where she grinds up against you, it's probably okay to grind with her a bit, but then move on.

• Girls who are cold and unreceptive to meeting men. These women are easy to spot as they avoid eye contact at all costs. They are also experts at avoidance tactics. It's as if they, not only want to avoid contact, but also want to avoid proximity with males who might try to establish contact.

• Girls who make a big deal out of needing "chemistry". These women are usually eternally single and have a laundry list of requirements. Next.

• Girls who want you to travel a far distance to meet them.

• She flakes and the reason for it wasn't a matter of life and death.

• She asks you to buy her a drink.

• A girl who wants you to have a threesome with her and her boyfriend. Chances are this is an extremely selfish woman who wants to be treated like a QUEEN at the same time by two men. Such propositions happen more often if you're a good looking guy, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but the fact that such women will view you as a "trophy" of sorts, is a bad thing.

These are a few of the reasons for rejecting a woman. You might have more, but for me personally it comes down to what I want and how much work I am willing to put in to get it. I don't want girls who play games and don't make it easy for me, especially now that I have the KNOWLEDGE that women CAN make it easy if they want to.


francisco said...

hi!... My name is francisco from Venezuela (my english is not good)... I've been reading your blogs... Your commentaries are very interesting... I think you are right about dating... One question: do you think that your way of thinking is a result of your seduction training? A mean, did you have to live that experiencies to achive that conclusions? Who would be if you did'nt become a seducer?

Vittorio said...

Hi Francisco, my way of thinking is a result of several different influences. So my conclusions aren't a product of any one way of thinking (like seduction). Although my efforts in seduction did accelerate my learning at times.

So I try to base my conclusions on just what makes sense, and what any reasonable person would do as well, if they went through the same experiences.

francisco said...

well, Vittorio. Again... Your experiences are very interesting... (i'm trying to say it in english, but i can't, please tell to a friend who speaks spanish to translate it):
"quiero decirte que tus experiencias, en cierta forma, me inspiraron para revaluar la manera como me relaciono con los demás, en especial con las mujeres... Te felicito nuevamente. Y aunque no vivo en Canada, siempre estaré pendiente de tus articulos. Te deseo suerte..."
good luck, from venezuela!

Paul said...

hi,Great blog!

I'm in Ireland and when chatting up women in clubs etc and after 10 secs, women will always ask "what do you work at??".

When I tell them I look them in the eye and without them even blinking they make an excuse and literally walk away! Its sucks and I know that I've saved myself a lot of hassle by them ending the conversation. Also they sometimes ask "what sort of car do I drive!" yes, you guessed it I walk!
But this is dating in Ireland now and it sucks big time that I don't bother chatting to women to pick them up at all now as its such a chore and I avoid clubs just go about my life and flirt with women in daily life that are open to me. As you can guess the success rate is low but at least its less stressful.
My friends say the exact same thing and its obvious that its cos they are looking for a man with a big wallet-eg: Some friends have professional jobs-lawyers etc yet although they are just scraping by in their jobs,(even though I've got a better paying job than them but its a blue collar job!) yet when they go to clubs and tell women what they work at they have no trouble picking up women!! Yet its an uphill slog for me so I'm turned off chatting up women and have been for many years!

Internet dating is the same here too as women write it down clearly in plain english what they "deserve" that a man must have to be with them. In my experience its the more educated women are more demanding.
(Btw I'm 35 yr old man!- I bought your ebook today).

John said...

Hi Paul, it appears that all westernized cultures are breeding a certain type of woman that is completely dillusional in terms of her self worth. Such monstrous behaviour by certain members of the "fairer" sex must not be tolerated. Kudos on taking a stand.

John said...

Hi Paul, it seems that western culture has created women with a dillusional sense of their own self worth. Such monstrous behaviour by certain members of the "fairer" sex must not be tolerated. Kudos for taking a stand.