Sunday, December 11, 2011

Women's Boring Fake Internet Profiles Receive Boring Fake Responses From Men

Women using the internet to meet men always complain about the lack of good responses from men. Well, in addition to the women being too picky there's another good reason why the responses seem "inadequate". It's the lack of substance in the women's profiles which give the men nothing to work with. You get all these women writing boring, cookie-cutter internet profiles, which in turn invites boring cookie-cutter responses from men.

For example, let's say the essence of a certain woman's profile states that she likes camping, dogs, and shopping. How is a guy supposed to respond to that? Does he say "Hi, I like camping and dogs too"? He could, but that would get him rejected for being too boring and not putting much thought into the response.

Here's another example. Let's say a woman writes that she likes to listen to music, likes to try new things, and is health conscious. That still gives you little to work with. The best you can really do is respond back saying basically the same thing, which of course gets rejected for the same reason as above.

The hard truth is that there's simply no way to write a unique and original response to a woman's profile if the profile itself is not unique and original. And believe me, most women's profiles are very generic and boring, especially if the women are attractive. So it is very ironic when responses get dismissed by women for having the same lack of imagination as their profile.

In addition to the short boring response, the only other possible response is the try-hard response, in which men try hard to come up with a good response. But because they have nothing to work with it usually results in them over-reaching, which in turn results in their response sounding fake and try hard. And the result is once again that they are dismissed by the women, but this time for being fake and try hard.

Not surprising, when women complain about men who write short unimaginative responses, the men say it's because when they write long thoughtful responses they get ignored. Looking more closely, what's really happening is that men (when responding to boring one-dimensional female profiles), can only exercise one of two options: either write the short unimaginative response, or the long fake response. And given that both have an equal probability of failing, they naturally choose the option that will result in better time management.

My advice to the women who complain about the constant lack of good responses from men: Stop being so picky and seriously consider adding substance to your profile.

Some ways to add substance to your profile are:

• Mention a really exciting experience you've had
• Mention something quirky about yourself
• Talk about the shows you liked as a kid
• Talk about a trip you went on
• Talk about the kind of man you are attracted to and what you are looking for (without regurgitating what the magazines say)

If your profile is bland and generic sounding and you don't take steps to rectify it then you have no right to complain. As the saying goes, garbage in = garbage out.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Why change when the status quo is working so well for them? Women are deluged with messages and IMs regardless of what they do. The hotter the pic, the more attention she gets. The worst thing is that you don't even know if you're sending your message to a woman.

Anonymous said...

your photos are probably what drives success with internet dating. With cool photos, you could probably say nothing more than hello, and have good odds of getting a response. I don't know what photos would be successful, but probably those showing social proof, wealth, or some other indicator of status. This sort of thing indicates that the supply of men exceeds the demand, otherwise women would be more responsive to a "boring" opener.

Anonymous said...

I believe men write short one liners because they know that for every reply they make, another 100 men are doing the same. Men are easy and men - and women - know it. The only thing that works nowdays is money, status and social proof. Which means the truth is hardly anyone is actually having sex.

Anonymous said...

Many women on the dating sites are there not to meet men, but to degenerate otherwise perfect system dating system. So the excuse that responses are boring is similar to refusal to hook up on the streets, in nightclubs or in bars.

Anonymous said...

I wish the author and readers of this blog could read this message: move out of Toronto !!!

I lived there and it was hell on earth, like I am convinced there is no worse place in the world to live than Toronto. You know how they say no one is more blind that the one who does not want to see... well, Torontonians think they are in heaven but they are living in hell, yet they totally think they are in heaven.

Stupid insecure pretentious beta people deserve what they get anyway.

-Harry.

Anonymous said...

This is precisely why I don't send women messages anymore. I just let my profile sit and just let women find me. At least I know that she's 100% interested, whereas sending a woman a message where there's a great chance that she won't be interested at all.

Anonymous said...

There's a site called EDateReview where users (men AND women) can submit reviews of various dating sites. Check it out...

www.edatereview.com

John said...

It's true, it's better to let women message you, which I've written about before. The odds are stacked against you if you do it any other way, especially on sites where women get loads of messages.

Anonymous said...

Here's a response from a male reviewer at edatereview.com. Hilarious....

"First of ladies here is list that you study carefully okay? We men don't care about this shizzle and so keep it off your profiles got it!
1. Travelling pics: who cares where you have travelled to.
2. Adventure pics: Skydiving, mountain climbing, parachuting, etc.
3. Pics with all your stupid friends in some bar with all of those fake, vapid, deer in the headlights looking smiles plastered from ear to ear.
4. MOST ANNOYING: Flights of fancy like poems, lyrics to some crappy chick songs, best quotes, your "glass being half full" drivel. I am looking for a date not your philosophical view of life.
5. Pics of your pets. Look, I like animals and all but lets stay the course okay?
6. Diatribes about how you so wonderful and good and how you've been f-ed over by every man you've ever been involved with. Spare me okay?!
7. Describing everything that you not looking for like the rote: "I don't want any liars, cheaters, game players, seperated or married me, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah..... I could counter with: I don't want any bi-polar, anti-depressant addicted, nerotic, middling intelligent, divorced women saddled with children and limited time for dating..... Come on! Get real okay?!
8. Women with a high school education making $25,000 a year looking for men who earn $100,000 + a year. Can you say: Gold-digging BIMBO here!
9. Inflated sense of self-worth and importance. I ain't reading a freaking novel about you on the site okay?! Keep it short and sweet. If there is a rapport or further interest then I will find out more about you on my own. I refuse to read several paragraphs of drivel about some stranger. Well, maybe if she's really hot I might! (jk)
Even then though it would be a major turn off.
10. Ladies, follow this advice. Be humble and accommadating like women were fifty years ago. That is how to keep a man in your life for the long haul. Not bragging about about travelling to Paris, Rome, East Jibet, etc. While you were screwing some smarthy frenchie in Paris I was busy putting steam on the table for my wife and 5 kids!

Match.com is basically a sasuage-fest and the preening, soccer-mom divorcees who get an ego boost from having their behinds kissed by these guys on the site. It sucks and is a waste of time. My advice is stay away and use the services of a lady of the night. Okay, take care.
"

Anonymous said...

Why bother? i respect people's persistence and no i'm not a defeatist, just a realist, looking at it the way it is. Are these women really worth it?

IMO as a 22 year old guy, happy with his bachelor lifestyle, the answer is no.

I'd rather stick to stip clubs and pay for sex and dedicate the rest of my time that i would've spent messaging these women doing something productive.

Worse comes to worst, there's always porn.

Saves me a lot of money, a lot of heartache AND pregnancy/fake-rape claims free :)

Anonymous said...

Here's an interesting take on your discussions: a MUST READ

http://livinginthedeadcity.weebly.com/our-man-in-the-dead-city.html

The Rice Knight said...

dude 100% right on don't know what else to say, you should do a thing on office workplace too same attitudes get transferred into the work place...

Anonymous said...

well I`m old, so I had my fair share of online dating in the hay days of he internet

you know dial-up modem, forums, irc chat, net caffes

than later came sites like hi5 and myspace

99% of the women I`ve met through the internet were all insecure, socially akward, overweight, dressed like crap

10 years have passed, nothing changed in that arena and people still believe this fairy tale of online dating

figure this

1. if a woman looks at least average and has some brains, she already got a stream of guys anyway, why the hell would she need extra advertisement?

2. our species evolved offline, homo sapiens is old, probably 200,000 years, but we only got this internet shit since 20 years or so, we lived so long without it and suddenly we should die out without high-tech

3. if a girl is tech savvy, in 90% of the cases it`s not because she likes it, it`s because she ain`t got a life, no one`s fucking her, because she`s crazy and at home hiding, so she got time to kill and to figure out how to create profiles, sites and post shit on forums

so what`s next?

dating AI, fucking robots instead of people, than downloading some children, because giving birth is dangerous?

I think the best quick & dirty screening test for women would be this


test 1 - do you look decent?

yes? proceed

test 2 - do you have an online dating profile?

yes? next pls


by the way, here`s the link on homo sapiens

http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2005-02/uou-toh021105.php

Anonymous said...

Don't even bother. I tried online, I even tried to stoop way below girls I normally pull just to see if this was real or fake. Girls who would eye hump me down in reality, I couldn't get the light of day from online, why would I even bother to continue in those circumstances

Anonymous said...

Because you lack access to other girls...